Are you good at what you do? What would you like to be better at?

For the past couple of months, I have been busy with the blogging gig and I am really having a great time sharing my heart’s content with the world – that side of the world where no one knows me personally.

Hiding

Berryduchess is unknown to my personal circle. I chose to keep it under the radar because I have this fear of being judged in many possible ways – from the grammar to my lifestyle.

I used to be open and living my life just the way I like it. I thought everyone can potentially be my pal and my friends are extended families. I used to think that people will be happy for you when something good happens in your life because that’s what I do. But there were events in the past that proved them wrong. I guess Dennis Wholey was right after all this time.

“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.”

– Dennis Wholey

Realization

There were many times that I felt was judged just because of the brands of my choice or that time when I decided to be the stay-at-home wife. My husband would always tell me not to care because either way, people will always have something to say. I acknowledge his point, but things still made me feel insecure in some ways.

Blogging discreetly was like a rehabilitation activity for me. I get to write and post things that I really like. With this pseudonym, I can be myself and not be afraid of disapproval from people I know. Maybe seeking approval is just part of human nature, unfortunately, I am affected by it.

I asked for help in my previous posts and a number of people would participate and the rest were curious about the write-up. Some were interested to read the final articles/posts and I agreed to share it after.

Though I was scared, I remained true to my words and provided the link. While I did not hear anything from others after reading, the rest of them loved my works. I felt so relieved and appreciated 😀 Few of them even mentioned that it was written like the articles in magazines and my heart skipped a beat! Another comment was that they like my blog overall and they were happy for me. 🙂  * 2 points for the confidence boost!

Am I good at what I do?

So can I say that I’m good at what I do? I want to believe that I am getting there. Truth is, I am thankful to have followers and the number is increasing 🙂  I am also thankful that people are liking and commenting in my posts because whether you admit it or not, these things increases our confidence as a blogger. It helps us push for more and come up with better things to discuss because we know that someone is actually reading our work. 😀

Am I proud of what I do? Yes, I am proud of what I have accomplished so far, but maybe not proud enough, I guess? If there is something that I want to be better at, that will be on the “giving a damn” department. I hope not to be too affected by the unpleasant things I hear or learn from the people I know. Like what I always say in the past, one can always ignore a praise or criticism from a stranger, but once it comes from your family or friends, it will have a greater impact on you.

Harvey Specter on Caring

I am still trying to gather that confidence until the day comes that I can openly share my work in my personal social media. As I move forward, I want to further improve my writing skills and hope to come up with better ways of presenting my thoughts. Lastly, I want to truly believe in myself that I can be better with this. I am giving myself a pat on the back and acknowledge the fact that there will always be room for improvements. I aim to live free from self-doubt. 😀

What about you? Do you have fears as a blogger or you are very confident in what you do? 😀

The greatest prison people live in, is the fear of what other people think.

– Anonymous

xoxo berryduchess

5 thoughts on “ A Blogger’s Confession: On Self-Doubt ”

  1. I would like to say “THANKS YOU!” first of all.

    I have been blogging for a total of three days, and I have had a million questions in my mind about whether I should keep my blog away from my social media and acquaintances, and I realise I am not alone.

    Thank you again!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Because mine isn’t a personal blog, I find it easier to share my posts on Facebook and stuff. Back when I had a personal blog, though, I used my own name but I didn’t share it on social media and only a few people knew about it. I think you’re doing great with your blog! It seems like you’re just being true to yourself, and I think that’s the most important thing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you 😀 Yes that is true! now, I limit my posts in my personal social media. I prefer to share it in here where the people who gets to read it will apprciate the things I share and not see it as “showing off” or being a happy-go-lucky person. With blogging, I am slowly gaining the confidence back. I don’t know what is happening but it seems like my personal social media limits me hahaha weird pero that’s true. I want to be that person who don’t care what other people might say. 🙂 I want to be true to myself 😀

      thanks for your words of encouragement it means a lot! 😉

      Liked by 2 people

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